It's 2010, bitches!

And I have nothing interesting to report in my life at all. AT.ALL.

Mom's hair is growing back, and she's doing fine. Dad's back to work, and he hates it. He'd retire if he didn't think mom really needed the insurance. She says she doesn't. I agree with Dad. Medicare doesn't pay for SHIT, so he's got to work.

I'm pretty ok. I am having more painful instances than not painful ones lately..so I'm going through those Tylenol 3's like there's no tomorrow. My doctor will love that. Yesterday was so bad, I actually cried and said to Phil "we need to start trying for a baby. I can't take this anymore" He said " I know, I hate to see you in pain".

We have agreed to start trying next year. And by next year, I am hoping that means somewhere September-December. He gets done with probation in May, so that will hopefully open us up to MOVING. We have to pick a state, and figure out what their teaching requirements are, so we can make sure to comply.

I think I might be planning a wedding for 2011 too. I'm still in love with Hawaii. Phil's coming around.

Figures that 2011 might be the year I get everything I ever wanted, and the end of the world will soon follow according to the Mayans.


It wouldn't be the new year without some resolutions to make and break. Here are mine:

Nikki's New Year Resolutions 2010:
1) get in better shape/lose weight/improve health
2) save money. SAVE.MONEY.AT.ALL.COSTS.
3) pay bills ON TIME!
4) MOVE out of mom's house.
5) Keep Phil motivated to look for work, and places to live. In PA, out of PA, I don't care.
6) eliminate drama, and people that cause it from my life. (Jason)
7) Spend more time with my friends. (Karin and Rachel, I am still looking forward to Mamma Mia night)
8) SAVE MONEY
9) Have a better attitude about work.
10) Really take care of my finances.


How sad is it that most of my resolutions are about money? I'm 33 and I don't know how to manage my money? I'm 33 and I can't figure out how this credit thing works?
God, Help me. Thanks.

Merry Fucking Christmas. Ho Ho Ho and all that garbage.

Ok, I am the farthest thing from a "Scrooge" or a "Grinch" that you'll ever see. I LOVE Christmas. I LOVE giving gifts. I love everything about the holiday. I even LIKE to go see our families! *gasp!*

Here's what I don't like, and what I can do without:
1) Traffic. Seriously, learn how to fucking drive. And out of staters who come here for our glorious tax free food and clothing----U TURNS ARE ILLEGAL IN PA. STOP DOING THEM IMMEDIATELY. Also, use the turn signals your car was equipped with. And, please invest in some sort of GPS unit, so you are not constantly slamming on your breaks at every single possible entrance to a store/mall/plaza. And quit cutting me off in the lanes just because you don't know where you're supposed to be.

2) Asshatty DoucheBag shoppers. If it's in my cart, YES I PLAN TO BUY IT. No, I DON'T CARE that you "can't find one anywhere" or that "it's all my kid asked for" Too fucking bad, and if I see your hands in my cart I swear on the Baby Jesus that I will break every fucking bone in them.

3) Eggnog. Really? Gross. Keep it away from me.

4) Ingrateful assholes who shall remain nameless, who can't buy a fucking CARD for either of my parents (who raised him!) but CAN spend money on our mutual sperm donor. (oh and if you know the nameless wonder, don't tell him what I wrote..no I'm not talking shit, it's nothing I wouldn't say to his face, just don't be a dick, alright?)

5) SNOW. and ICE. Please go away, forever.

6) Fake-nice at "obligatory" parties. If I don't talk to you all year long, why would you think that I want to talk to you now that it's Christmas? Be gone, interloper, you're not cool enough for us.

7) Remakes of Christmas songs. Yes I know there are only so many ones to go around. I don't mind other artists re-interpreting traditional songs like Silent Night, or Frosty, what I don't care for is the 5000 "singers" who suddenly think it's a great idea to cover Wham's "Last Christmas". No, it's not a good idea, and you suck at life.

8) People who can't give you a wish list when you ask for one. Seriously, if I have asked you what you want for Christmas, it's because I want to give you a gift. Not because I want you to buy me one. Please, try to come up with something a little more specific than "ohmygosh I don't want anything at all..........but..maybe something with squirrels or owls on it"

9) People who don't take my wishlist seriously, or tell me "oh that's not a gift". Hey, I take the time to think of some things to suggest, and they are things I either want/need, so if you don't want to get it for me, don't, but don't tell me that I have a ridiculous list full of non gifts. Maybe I LIKE socks!

10) Once again, not naming names...but "people" who don't bring anything ever, but stick their hands out expecting it to be filled with gifts. And then not even trying to disguise the disappointment when you are given something that you think is beneath you. Grow the fuck up, and be happy you got anything at all...because you sure didn't get us anything.


Happy Holidays!

When Lord....when.

Wow, 2 days in a row with the blogging! Calm down peoples, I know how exciting it is.

So, from the title of this blog, I am asking God for a time frame. About what, you ask?

Let me tell you.

Bedtime last night was the standard, 930ish-1000. Went to sleep with no issues at all (for a change). Fast forward to 200 am, where I am rudely awakened from a lovely dream featuring David Duchovny (yeah, I love me some Fox Mulder) by the stabbing pain in my uterus that plagues me, randomly. It was enough to not only wake me from a sound slumber--but have me leap from the bed saying "owowowowowowowowowfuckmeowowowowfuckfuckfuckowowowowow" Took a Lortab. Laid back down, pillow in between legs, gritting teeth, and bargaining with God. As is "God make the pain stop, and I will go to Church this sunday" "God make the pain stop, and I will donate more $$ to the Salvation Army this Christmas" "God make the pain stop, and I will stop being a Class A Bitch to everyone I see".

God did not take me up on any of my offers. At 0315, the pain was still raging. So I took Lortab #2, and was trying to remember if there are dangerous drug interactions with Tylenol 3, as that was going to be the next narcotic I tried to get rid of the pain.

Finally, sleep came back to take me....around 430, I think. I had to get up at 6 for work today, so basically, I feel like the walking dead. I'm still stoned from the Lortab, and everytime I blink my eyes, I have to tell myself to open them back up.

I'm starting to wonder if the 5% chance of losing my uterus is worth getting rid of this pain.
I might call Dr. Genius in Pittsburgh, just to ask his opinion. Maybe he doesn't think there is a risk at all. Maybe I let one of them there Pittsburgh doctors cut my uterine cavity open.

I just don't know.

Tis the season

To want to rip your hair out!

Christmas shopping is stressful time. No one will tell me what they'd like to get, but everyone expects me to pick out the perfect gift because "you know me so well". Gee thanks for the help.
I so love watching my bank account dwindle down to nothing while I am in pursuit of the "perfect gift".

My mother is doing very well. She got the "all clear" to go do whatever it is that she wants, whenever she wants to do it. That's great! She only has to go to shitsburgh every 6 months now, and follow up with a local doctor. More good news!

I'm doing fine, thanks, aside from wanting to stab everyone in the eyeball lately.
Seems I've been eating a steady diet of Bitch McNasty pills, and they are working!

Someday I will actually approach this blog with an idea, or a theme in mind, and then I will have something well thought out written. But today is not that day, my friends, so too bad.

Catching up

So...

Mom's home. She's doing well. She's extremely immuno-suppressed so we have to be very, very careful with her.

She's up and crazy though. No stopping her.

Phil had the flu, then I got sick just as he was getting better, and that was right around when mom came home. So we've been "quaranteened" to my room. We wear masks when we leave my room, and sanitize the shit out of our hands before we touch anything.

Not much going on. Not much at all. Pretty boring.

Getting geared up for the holidays. I need to start my shopping, but of course no one knows what they want. It's always "oh I don't know" "oh you don't have to get me anything" blah blah.

The stressful time is about to begin. I am asking for giftcards this year. To Best Buy. I want a lap top.

Gift cards will help with that.

Anyway.......

Oh..

Lest I forget, I have a class reunion coming up. *ugh*.

Does anyone know any way to lose weight quickly? I'm talking gastric bypass fast, without the messy surgery.

Probably not!

I am SO looking forward to seeing my ex fiancee. *eye roll*

Not much new.

So mom is still in shitsburgh, dad is back down with her, and Phil's sick. Boo sick.

I don't have much going on to talk about....so for your reading pleasure,

http://www.jennepper.com/2009/10/day-i-struck-my-mother-blind-with-my.html


This girl is seriously funny. You won't regret clicking the link.

Transplant, successful! with bonus Gyno visit talk thrown in.

Mom had her stem cell transplant yesterday. It was very fast, and went well, or so I am told.
Hooray!!!! Now she just has to stick it out down there in shitsburgh, until the docs say she can leave.
We're looking at probably a minimum of 15 days, to a maximum of 5 weeks.

She's doing well. Losing her hair, but keeping her spirits up. Yesterday after the transplant was complete, my dad left and went to Giant Eagle, and got her a birthday cake, to celebrate her "new birthday". Mom cried. Dad can be very thoughtful, and romantic and sentimental when he wants to be.

And now for the bonus OB/GYN girlie bits talk!

I had my appointment with my GYN yesterday. He said that he absolutely can take the fibroid out....................wait for it.............................BUT!

a) it's a major procedure.
b) there is a 5% chance that I will lose my uterus.

He said that if Phil and I had a child or two already, then the decision wouldn't be as scary. But since we do not, we really have to think about that risk.
The doctor's flat out advice is to have a child first. He did give me "terms" to look up on WebMD, because he wants me to be as educated as I can be.

The fibroid is between 1 and 2 centimeters smaller than my uterus (which is why they thought it was a duplicate), and it's literally on top of the left portion of my uterus. He told me that he can cut it out, but it will take part of my uterus too. He said that "normally" they are able to "reconstruct" the missing part, BUT in about 5% of cases, they cannot and end up having to REMOVE the uterus too.

That would be extremely devestating to me. So, Phil wants me to call Dr. Genius, but I have to agree to with Dr Hereathome. I want a baby too badly to fuck around with the possibility of losing my baby cage (as Andrea calls it...hehehe).

Dr Hereathome asked about the pain, how frequent it is, how bad it is, etc. He asked if it's something that I just can't tolerate on a day by day basis. I told him I don't have it every day, maybe once or twice a month. He gave me a prescription for Tylenol 3 to take in case the Naprocyn doesn't work.

I pretty much have decided to live with this for the next couple of years. Like I said, I want a baby. I don't want to hurt my chances even more.